The Hardest Part

a few years ago

I don't know if any of you know (or care for that matter) that I am the father of two adopted boys, one of whom is somewhere within the autism spectrum realm as they say. I am also the foster dad to two more boys, which leads to nary a dull moment around our house.

I wrote something recently for my two sons that I would like to share, I don't know how many people feel as I about their children, maybe it has to do with adoption, maybe with autism, maybe I've just completely gone around the bend. Anyhow it is a sentiment and an affirmation to them and myself that they indeed are loved and always will be. It goes something like this:

The hardest part for me

Hasn't been the loving

It hasn't been the showing

The true meaning of life
It hasn't been the sharing

Or the caring

Or the daring to be true

It hasn't been the difference

Between all of me and you

It hasn't been those nights we've lost

It hasn't been the extravagant cost

It hasn't been those things between the lines

It hasn't been all those times

Where it all got miss-communicated

It wasn't those words you said

How you really hated

Me and us, how we should be dead

It’s never been about the past

It wont ever be about your loss

Or what you should have gained

It’s only a fear you’ll lose

This life’s love and joy

Truly the hardest part has always been

One day knowing you will no longer be mine.

Leave it all behind

Shaking off my jack boots

Itching for a ride
Thinking off down the canyon
Maybe find some place to hide.
Mind runnin on memory
Dusty old beaten track
Makes a man think he understand
Why someone invented crack.
Gonna ride until the sun pass me by
Just leave it all behind
Check out a new world
One don't run on a dime
Buzzards over head are callin
Waitin on a friend
I think I'll give em company
Right on down to no end.
Ain't worried about tomorrow
Maybe what Christmas'll bring
Yesterday done caught me again
Same old rusted thing
It don't much matter I guess
How far you ride the trail
Thinkin about how it was suposed to be
You'll find it's much like reading brail

Caffeine Break!!!

I am having trouble focusing on my other writings (too much caffeine!) so I thought I would write about an album that is new to me although probably not newly produced. As you know, if you’ve read any of my earlier posts, I went to Italy in 1992 sort of to play music and to think about things. I stayed with a good friend of mine, who was also the guitarist I played in a band with, Leonardo Boni. He is truly a fabulous guitar player. We met, I don’t remember the year, back in Putney School in Vermont and established a decent rapport down through the years. I am introducing you to him here because not only was he a big part of my life for a while (in both Boston and Florence. He resides in Florence now.), but he has created a new album of music both original and cover songs which is now available (I think you can go to www.leoboni.com to order it). I spent an evening with Leo our last trip to Tuscany and was able to get my hands on a copy.

When we talk about guilty pleasures we talk about something that is so deeply satisfying that it must be, has to be, bad for you and therefore burdensome in a guilty way. The pleasure comes right from your toes up your spine and makes your scalp ache (at least it does to me!). That is how I feel about what he has created here, Leo has hit a guilty chord within me and if you would take a listen, I am sure you will feel the same way. The childlike innocence and joy with which he plays each song treating it as a wake up call for happiness, even those tunes that are wrapped in a sad sounding package. From Louis Armstrong, to Tom Waits, his vocals run through texture and timbre resonating well with the Mediterranean/swing/gypsy sounds that he has developed. Leo has been playing many genres of music for many years and here I think he has hit his stride with a happy traipse through the landscape of his (and mine) beloved Tuscany otherwise known as Toscana. If you are looking for a guilty pleasure that is non fattening nor fatal if swallowed, give a listen to Sogno Toscano, it will be, I’m sure, habit forming.

 Sogno Toscano is a window into the heart of a musician who is truly smitten by the history, vitality and beauty of the land he calls home. I would recommend to all; give him a shout and ask him for a copy! I have tried to set up links to his site and to youtube for a sample. I hope they work!

Anyhow, I am having trouble sitting still so until next time I get jumpy…enjoy!

Finally a musical composition!

Here is a bit of the past mixed with that of the present. I was finally able to put music to photo and came up with this little montage. I hope you like it!

Tried to upload a movie put together with music and pics. Still don't know what I'm doing!

A Quick Look-See at La Vigna

So I finally figured out how to get a video loaded into this Blog space! 21st century and all, you'd think I might have a better handle on this stuff, I don't! I am just as confused today about this computer garbage as I was twenty years ago. I can't figure out why it all seems so complicated, just that it does is enough to keep

 

me from posting a lot of things (probably just as well)!

Here is a clip of La Vigna taken this last trip, if I could figure out how to do it I would have joined it with some other clips and put it all together with some lovely songs but as aforementioned I am an idiot and it took me all day to figure out how to load this one clip! Maybe in another ten years I'll understand how to put it to music! In the meantime, check out the clouds at the end, a pretty cool rainstorm came up that afternoon, didn't do much to cool things off but it was neat watching it approach.

Latest view

The reason it is called La Vigna

So we just returned from Italy and I must say, the jerks that stole our copper gutters at La Vigna did a pretty good job of it. I mean to say that there was little damage to our home other than the missing gutters, no broken roof tiles, no missing brackets. We understand that many homes and developments in the area were hit as well and quite a bit of damage was done to some of the properties so I guess we should consider ourselves lucky.

We spoke to our Geometra about putting up an automatic gate at the entrance to our property on the white road (so called for its gravel surface). Unfortunately it would seem that our "driveway" really isn't a driveway but exists on the community maps as another "road", which means that we would not have the right to install a gate subsequently blocking traffic! Nobody uses the drive other than a few hunters and people on foot looking for mushrooms or wild asparagus. We were disappointed but not surprised to here this, although he did say that he would look into changing the designation for us. The other thought we had had was to install some sort of security system. Once again though we are not dealing with 21st century technology over there! There is no cable and therefore no internet! We would have to install a dish/satellite system or figure out some cellular thing and it makes my head hurt just thinking about it. Our best bet is to hurry up and complete the project before someone steals the roof!

As you can see...

all brackets...

are still there!

 This is the small barn next to the house which we will have as a separate apartment on two floors. The following set of photo's show the lower floor entrance and the area that will be a private patio. The view is spectacular and once all the walls etc. are complete it will be a dream location.

These last two pics are of the main apartment entrance and the great wall of China behind the house!

Slowly but surely... isn't that what the turtle said?

Lack of Confidence

What compels someone to go to such lengths to steal something belonging to others? We received an update from the local Carabinieri that ours is not the only property in the area that has been hit like this, individuals stealing copper and materials from homes under construction. That makes us feel tons better! We're not alone! Great! What we would really like to know is what the hell are they doing about it? They should be talking to every contractor in the area as well as to every single business that receives scrap metal as well as any and all junk yards etc, someone must know something, for it took trucks and equipment to do this evil. Our fear is that they are being typical Carabinieri and sitting around their station until the thieves walk in and tap them on the shoulder!
I recall many years ago in the piazza of Strada In Chianti there was a bank on the corner that had an atm machine mounted into the wall so that it was accessible twenty four hours a day without having to go inside. Keep in mind the station of the Carabinieri is just a few doors up from this bank in the same piazza. One night thieves backed a truck up to the atm machine, bolted chains to it and ripped it out of the wall towing it away and doing thousands in damage, not only making off with whatever was in the machine. The Caribinieri found the machine a couple of days later but never found the thieves! How is that for police work! In other words, we have our doubts that we will ever recover our property or even find out who did this!
Depressing to say the least, I get that times are tough and many people are out of jobs but do we need to resort to this? Could you do this? Would you do this?

This is just the type of thing when it happens to you that makes you lose faith in others. I don't mean just the thieves, they are just morons. I mean the society we thought we built to protect against such heinous activity. Where is it??

Thieves at La Vigna!

So it has happened again. This is the second time it has happened to us and I suppose we should call ourselves lucky in that no one was harmed but it still hurts badly. The latest information from La Vigna is the theft of all the copper gutters and downspouts. This wasn’t material lying around the jobsite, this was already installed aged and beautiful stuff! Almost fourteen thousand dollars worth of copper gone in a heartbeat! I know the world is becoming a little more desperate and things aren’t going well for people… but come on, really? You have to go and steal stuff from someone’s property that has already been installed? The first time the jerks stole stuff it was a pallet of ceiling tiles that were waiting to be installed in the second floor. This time the thieves must have brought equipment, ladders and such to take it all down from the second floor eves, imagine the gumption! These gutters had been installed several years ago and we had opted for the extra expense of copper for longevity and look, now what the hell do we do? This is a budget job that we are trying to do with limited funds but do the right way. We don’t want to use crappy material that will detract from the look and feel of the Tuscan countryside. I don’t know anymore, maybe we should just throw up plastic windows and plastic gutters and say the hell with it just to get it done. I certainly don’t know if we will be able to put back gutters like those, unless of course we hit the lottery.

Feel Free-

Hi! For all you that have read this stuff, or not, please feel free to comment! I think I have it set up right so please don't hesitate, even if you wish to tell me to stop writing all this drivel! I probably won't... but...Let me know if you have any questions too.

Ben

And on I go...

I think I did become topic of many conversations while I stood there waiting as the world spun without me, for I realized that it was extremely difficult to go anywhere with my load of goods, quickly becoming apparent that it would be best if I left the cart and its contents in one location, unfortunately there wasn’t a secure area where I could abandon my life and be sure of its security. Therefore I wound up being sentinel to it and paced around the cart like a moon forced into a mandatory service unwillingly and unwittingly around its planet. I received many a sideways glance and saw the odd upturn of the lips as passengers rolled their eyes at each other in passing, while I willed my thinly clad body not to shake itself to pieces from the cold. I would rotate for a while in the frigid air, blowing on numb fingers, then stand and gaze around waiting for time to pass, for wouldn’t you know it but I had four hours to kill before my train was scheduled to leave. Four hours isn’t so long when you are occupying your time and having fun, four hours is a lifetime when you are guarding your stuff in the freezing mid October air of Zurich’s massive train station, all the while cursing yourself for allowing someone in a toasty office to organize your trip for you. I couldn’t really fault her though, she put together a trip that she probably would have enjoyed and maybe I might have as well if I hadn’t been carrying a house on my back. I don’t recall much of those four hours beyond the stares and the cold, what is there to look at in a train station beyond people? Most folks, unlike me, were dressed for the season with long coats, hats and gloves, therefore not exactly pleasing to look at, no dancing girls here! I honestly have no idea what I was thinking, yea let’s head into the Alps wearing just a leather jacket in mid fall! Good idea!

I watched the train schedule board like it was an incredibly engrossing movie, willing it to advance quicker and bring my train to me, to no avail. It must have been days later that I saw a shimmering, glimmering ray of hope! The word Milano stitched across the giant board, I almost wept with relief. I felt as though I had been stranded in the frozen tundra of Lapland, my fingers stiff, my legs stiffer from standing, rarely orbiting, in one place for so long. Squaring my shoulders I dug in my heals heaving against my load, headed for the track as indicated, not sure if it were my bones or the wheels of the cart that were squeaking so loud. The effort warmed me and as I pulled alongside the train I only felt the slightest bit of nausea at the sight of the stairs leading up into the interior of the Pullman.

The battle with my gear lasted for some time as I had to pick up large, heavy, bulky items, mount several steps and traverse a narrow corridor to what I presumed was my spot within the train. The transfer of items into the train was quite a feat by myself and as time spun out I noticed a conductor pacing nearer and nearer as my pile dwindled. He finally approached me with his hands raised shouting something intelligible at me. I only say that because I couldn’t understand him, I presume he was quite intelligible in his own right, just not to me. I looked into his stern face and saw real anger there, wasn’t much I could do other than tell him I was moving as fast as I could, which I am sure he didn’t understand or didn’t want to. As I grabbed my last article from the cart and headed aboard I saw him wave frantically down the length of the train, turn and enter behind me, yelling the entire time. He followed me down the narrow hall and stood in the door of the compartment I had chosen, making odd gestures with his hands as he admonished me, presumably, about my slothfulness in loading all my stuff and how I had single handedly managed to delay the great Swiss watch of a railway system. I apologized profusely but he seemed bent on not accepting, continuing to yell and shake his hands at me until I realized that he was saying “Papers!” I smiled and handed him my passport as I looked around the cabin trying to find a spot to sit amongst all my junk. As I shifted a speaker cabinet from bench seat to the floor, I heard my friend flapping my passport at me, turning to see what was wrong I noticed that several people had gathered to listen to the conductors sermon, I gather it must have been quite good, I did like his gestures and the thing he was doing with my “Papers!” was intriguing although I sensed by now he was ready to throw me off the train, I am sure that would probably be too much work in all honesty for someone as important as he, verified by the lack of help handed me as I loaded gear earlier. At that moment an angel spoke through the fire that was expanding from my conductor friend, “He is asking to see your ticket, he says he doesn’t need your passport.” Ahhhhhh, light dawns on Marblehead! Such a simple request made so difficult by the barrier of language! I retrieved said document from my briefcase and handed it over, there was a scattering of applause in the hall as the conductor said something else unintelligible to me. Loudly and with a flourish, obviously playing to the crowd, he tore a portion of the ticket and handed the rest back to me. Turning on a tide of laughter he strode down the corridor, evidently leaving me in the dust, one more moronic stranger passing through his land.

I sat down hard as the train lurched forward, on my second leg of the journey into the future…………….

While we are waiting!

 So I thought I would share some more pics will we are all just standing around waiting for this thing to be done already!

 We are once again in a holding pattern, our Geometra (architect) is incredibly slow in completing calculations for the heat and hot water. We need those as well as plans as to how all the pipes will be run before we can talk to the plumbers! It would seem that all that plumbers do over there is install what and how they are told, they are not responsible for the mechanics of the installation, great! So it may take a while, we are also thinking about installing a Geothermal system to pull our heat and hot water out of the ground, anyone know much about this type of system?

 These pics here are from when we first purchased the pile of rocks, er, house!

It has been an interesting experience but it would be nice to be able to finish it!

 Snow in Chianti used to be a rare thing! These past few years have delivered a lot of the white stuff there during the colder months, global warming?

I hope to have some answers from the Geometra soon! So that we can move forward once again and get a couple of the apartments up and running!

It would be nice to be able to share this gorgeous spot with others!

Been a while

So I have been extremely busy with many, many irons in the fire, it has been hard to even think about writing anything in this space, although the icon on my toolbar calls me daily and I guiltily ignore it! I will write some updates soon, in the meantime here is a little poem that may or may not entertain!

The moon softly full

Held sway over us

In silver shadowed daylight

Blessed by the stars above

Tossed like so much spice

So clean so right

The colored trees turned

A stark and dreamy bright

The autumn dew heavy in the grass

Dampening our whispering feet

As we walked along

The stippled path

Towards the darkness of the ocean

It’s depths so cold

In a deep dark way

It’s thunder wet and alive

The creamy foam

Of it’s curling waves

Beckoned our mortal souls

A pounding pulse

There in crisp splendor

The beating of a heart

It’s sand a ribbon

White of sparkle

And soft as silk upon the toes

As we listened to the calling

Softly thrumming

The night song breezes

Whispered through the pines

Alive with sound

And foamy froth

In a crystal palaced sphere

Touching spray and depth

With naked bodies

We held our hands

In lovers warmth

Until all just disappeared.

Lovers warmth             .